Thursday, September 23, 2010

mindful service

See the waste; smell the trash
piss-stained street without conscience,
without consequence,
nights of strange dank sounds, stifled
days of dark sulfur fog, strangle faint
of future
Con me, con mine, give us a taste
of "Look at me, world!"
Give us a clock face, stern behind
a calculated smile
Give us candy-coating white powder,
power to gangle and glee in the open
colored rain.  Tagged with acid disdain,
we fall to our knees in worship.
Disassociate, ghosts of Christian past,
waifs of mortgaged time, salute us with
grandeur, stiff staff keeps us in
wavery line, pissing what we might
have been to mark the dust in passing.
gi'me, gi'me, gi'me
just a sad hit, another bad hit
lusty life out o' me head
out o' me bed
out o' me
Forgive me, forgive my mind oh dearest,
oh kindest, scent of sin
washed pure, washed white as snow
falls, lightens my old grey
imagines me
Do not pity
There is no mirror
There is no better
There is only now and memory
Hidden in pocket diaries and
molecules scents, scenes,
ordinary hells
Children mock in play,
create characters of mockery
of melted jelly beans, colors
blending in the setting light
There is no Knight
There is no Conquering Champion
only children
forgetting why they laugh
In the future we will sit in awe before big electronic windows overtaking our living rooms giving us pictures of reality to replace our lives
Eventually, perhaps, the "scientists" will discover that correlation is not causation and the brain/body/soul is a fully interactive system. The brain activity associated with depression is the brain going through its processes to tell you what is happening with your system. The brain activity will change as you change.
I get angry with the assumptions of these "scientists" that just because they like theories that seem to fit the facts that makes their theories the way it is. I can see these same facts and easily propose other theories that can in fact obviate the usefulness of all these big pharma solutions. As to the drug addictions (which they freely admit are habituated behaviors like gambling, shopping, all kinds of activities that include no "substances"): human tend to repeat behaviors for which we are rewarded. You can extinguish the reward. You can remove the association of the reward with the behavior. You can initiate behaviors with better rewards. But then, they don't even seem to understand that the giving one's life over, not to the drug but to seeking out and obtaining the drug, getting it in your system, then back to finding more is the point and not some kind of collateral damage or side effect. The point for the drug addict is to simplify their life to that single obsession to block out the life that they didn't want or never had.
Sweet and sour fruit of bittersweet summer
when taste and touch could overwhelm
sadness tender exploration, sense memory
oranges, apples
love and loss
seeds of blooming
Religion is not about spirituality, the "big questions," or relationships with the ineffable. Religion is about community, shared values, a tribal kind of comfort. Religion is easily used as a tool for those seeking to take control of the community for their own kind of comfort in having power over their lives by practicing power over others.
The essence of health is entanglement
It is no accident we are born not fully formed,
never can become complete independent
Life is giving and receiving,
a locus of meetings.
I have been saying since high school that my problem with science is that they so often get it wrong. I am learning to be more tolerant. It is not so much that they get it wrong, as they don't seem to understand that "science" is not knowledge, but a method to discover knowledge based on observation, theorizing, testing, observation, etc. So, at any point, we only have the knowledge of what we think we have seen and what we think that means, which keeps moving forward.
It's not about how long
It's not about now and gone
It's not about make it last
It's not about relive the past
It's not about memory
It's about the melody
The Song, the Poem, the painted wall
With Art, we visualize the All
But, no
Here in the gloom
Quiet, serene
sweeter than the bees
low light a welcome breath
of repair
tuned in to desire
of soft, simple glow
I am mine to admire
You say: "You are not yourself." Perhaps because it is not my self you seek. I say: "I am multitudes. Wait 'til the I you seek comes around."
roads to wonder
dust erodes the twisted trail
dares and dalliance cast asunder
realign like rain to thunder
zagged dreams rewind the tale

It seems to me that instead of protesting about wanting jobs to politicians -- who after all only have a few patronage jobs which are mostly already promised -- we do better to do what we do, improve or learn new skills, figure out how to monetize and/or find others with whom to put together projects that can be sold.
the tax payers get the tab for essential research. Then the corporations get the contracts and make us pay again. Then the "conservatives" say we have to keep the corps happy and taxfree to provide the research we need to create jobs.
It is not a hard problem. It is not a problem. It is not telling stories, which is a whole other thing. Consciousness is the "I am" as the integrator of sensory input and experience, beyond the creative rationalization we call "stories" or internal dialog. It is that silent "voice" that knows exactly who we are.
We are not perhaps consciously aware in our prefrontal action center until the experience is processed to the degree necessary to form a narrative; this is not "consciousness," which is aware throughout, to some extent is, the processing process.
The point of love is not adoring of the perfect, but engaging with the just as imperfect as me because we are not alone.
You are not your debt. You are a marvelously complex interaction of biology, semiotics, spirit, and creative source. Debt is an imaginary sin created by an evil cabal of anti-life sorcerers who enjoy feeding on misery. Your debt is not even yours, unless you sign the contract with the devils to agree to fall under it. What is yours, that you can exult in, enjoy, share into a beautiful loving sphere of reality. Paying off the debt, like paying any bills, can be just a momentary task of practicality.
It's the same problem whether in the schoolyard or the town square or the political arena: finding the best response to end the bullying. Perhaps if we each realized that we are all potential scapegoats -- that in the schoolyard the bullies will exploit any difference to play their game -- we could stop enthrallment to the bullies' definitions and refuse to play.
 Republicans have been a lousy opposition party -- petty, mean, obtusely obstructionist, working on a theory of destroying government to get governmental power. It's all much too silly and tragic. The Democrats are no prize either. Yet, there are still many Dems I admire and want to see succeed because the idea of country as intercaring community makes more sense to me than country as warmonger.
The Republicans have cynically built their strategy around obstructionism. The point is not even so much to slow down government or pander to wealthy campaign contributors or show a strong opposition to those of a different political view. The point is to keep what needs to be done to improve the lives of US citizens from being done so they can play upon the resultant fear and anger.
The devil and the divinity is in the details. Yes, we need to start thinking, continue thinking, very clearly. Obviously we are much more interconnected as a people of this planet than in previous eras of world politics. A world government of some kind makes sense. But let it be based on more libertarian principles than most current governments.
What so bad about communism is that it gets vilified without cause by people who have totally distorted the meaning of the idea -- which is what communism is, an idea. The idea is that value, wealth, comes not from ownership of the means of production, but from labor. We own our bodies. We own our labor. We come together in a social context to each give of our labor what we can that all may be given what we need to form a familial, interactive, well cared for people. It is a beautiful idea, apparently not within human ability to enact as we are now. Apparently simple communism was very happily practiced by hunter-gatherer tribes, and even tribes today, both modern "communes" and as yet still primitive peoples in remote areas. What we think of as "Communism" was really a branch of imperialism. It was a cynical usurpation of the communist ideal to promote revolution against monarchy and loyalty to the new totalitarian regime. Oh, and actual communism is much more conducive to true democracy than actual capitalism. It is all about the society being ruled by the people, the workers who actually keep the system together. It is the very antithesis of totalitarian dictatorship.
Most of the stuff that happens does not happen in Washington, D.C. How many who waste so much time decrying or obstructing do anything useful on the local level? If we each had our local resources in order, there would be little left for the feds to have to manage, and much less waste of time, resources, outrage.
States do have legislatures. We do (those of us who do) vote for our state representatives. We can have a lot more influence on the state level if we just do the work to influence our state reps, to vote for those who do the work we want done. Yet, all the interest in influence seems to be directed toward D.C.
The problem isn't so much what is taxed as what is done with the resources thus extracted.
the rich (evil or otherwise) do not base their adherence to taxation based on fairness. The rich have tax lawyers and accountants whose fiduciary responsibility it is to minimize their employers' tax outlay, within the very complicated and therefore receptive to creative interpretation tax laws. The best boon would be if tax laws were simplified. As Elizabeth Warren promotes for financial contracts: two pages, large type, simple English.
I am chortling with love for 
your present, reminder
we plan; the cosmos smiles paternally
we love; we smile as one
we laugh; pain ripples outward, lightened
we cry; rivers mingle; the story carries on
I like in my expressions of thought to have form follow function. Poetry is to say more elegantly, beautifully, concisely, evocatively those ideas, images, impressions, stories that are too subtle, complex, emotionally charged, uncomfortable, confused or inchoate to be adequately addressed within the rules of prose. Poetry can be about breaking rules or adhering to strict structures, or finding the metalanguage that breaks codes of mundane communication.
One little peek; let the mask sneak 
face frown
allow reality it's healing 
let them know
it's ok, really
to be low
the only way to truly rise
We can not possibly save or tax ourselves out of this deficit, many years in the making in many foolish ways. We can either grow ourselves out of it -- very possible considering the breakthroughs in technologies every day that can lead to fantastically profitable industries we have no way of foretelling. Or, we can radically change our economic paradigm -- which seems to be happening as well.
But, no
Here in the gloom
Quiet, serene
sweeter than the bees grow
low light a welcome
breath of repair
tuned in to desire
of soft, simple glow
I am mine
to admire
Deny "global warming" all you want. But what are we going to do about the environmental changes that cause severe disruptions and loss of lives and resources?
People are legitimately scared. The world is changing quickly in many directions. The changes are not only uncomfortable, but often unmanageable within the world view that is generally encouraged and believed. Anxiety and rife; and the tried and true method to subdue anxiety is lashing out. People are easily turned toward hatred of those whom they perceive as elite, not familiar with real life as they know it, obstructive to what is taken up as the logical or time tested solutions. They do cling to the faith that has sustained them, that they have been taught is what can sustain them when everyday life is out of control. They want to believe in an archetypal America, land of prosperity, opportunity, rugged individualism, Christian ethics, under God. Can't you feel that heavy, heavy need for primal immersion, for stolid underpinning of tradition, for a divine hope and providence? Don't be cruel.

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